November 19


Diary of a SEND Mum (1) Identity Crisis & Setting Values

By Jo Fowler

November 19, 2020

dreams, empowerment, identity, identity crisis, life coach, purpose, reality, values

Identity crisis? Want to reconnect with your identity, but don’t know where to start!?

I had a huge identity crisis when I became a mum. Suddenly, I had this new dimension to my life, these little precious beings who turned up and in the very best way, turned my life upside down! I went from being a person driven by income, wealth, and power to someone who lived for my children and experiences. My purpose was to be there for my children and explore the world from their viewpoint. Why does that man live in a sleeping bag on the street? Why are the whales dying with a belly full of plastic? Children ask a lot of fascinating questions and their innocence shows up an awful lot of wrongs in society if we were only to listen!

Being responsible for a couple of mini-humans made me aware of the fragility of the Earth, the resources we take for granted, and the importance of creating a legacy. I felt that I should achieve something to better the world or help the people within it to help build a brighter future. But this is not the normal way to bother about such wider questions. Social responsibility is something we don’t often have the time to think about. The corporate world especially does not allow you the luxury of time to have such existential thoughts. I felt like this wasn’t somehow as valuable or accepted, and that I should focus on ‘just’ being a mum.

Why has society become a place that does not give value to the raisers of the next generation? Teachers, child carers, support services, charities all work towards supporting and improving the life we have, and yet they are among the worst paid jobs in the field.

I began to realize that it was my purpose to help others realign with their own inner strength. I want us to understand when we are thinking and doing how we’ve been conditioned to, and to tackle the stress that modern-day society suffers from. (Seeing the world as a money machine with a bottomless pit of food, water, animals, and life). So here is my purpose and reason for being that I hope will shape the direction of my decision making and career. I’m a life-coaching, society-helping, responsible human being with a message… We all have the power to make a positive change for ourselves and our future! 

My 7 values are:

  1. Share                   (Give back, pay it forward, gratitude, talk, listen)
  2. Family                 (Family, Friends, Honour, Respect, forgiveness)
  3. Passion               (Heart, soul, kindness, creativity, playful, try, laugh, drive, become, learn)
  4. Balance               (fairness, strength, personal space, health, fitness, mindful)
  5. Connect              (Synchronicity, Order, humanity, life, soul, spiritual)
  6. Protect                (loved ones, self, rights, feminist, future, planet, all beings, greater good, faith)
  7. Feel                     (trust, risk, relax, truthful)

Who are you? You are not your job title or your role and you are not just a name; you are a unique individual with hopes and dreams and unique potential. What drives you, motivates you, puts fire in your belly? On those days when you feel most alive, what is it that made you so very happy? If you can find 7 words that sum all of that up, then you’re doing well.

Reconnecting with your identity is the first step to becoming your greater self. Defining your true identity will open your mind to understand what you feel is your true purpose. With identity and purpose comes clarity of mind that will help turn down the noise of life’s busy demands and light up the one thing you should put your energy into. All you must do is take notice when you make decisions, do they agree with your core values? Yes – please proceed… No – take caution!

NLP Coaching helps clients to find out what they really want, to feel positive and empowered, and to turn dreams into reality.
How To Reconnect With Your Identity And Purpose

Jo Fowler

A modern-day earthy yet entrepreneurial mum. She's evolved from a senior finance professional working 70-hour weeks to a homestay mum with big plans. Her passions are centered around coaching and self-development, and to live and prosper authentically. She is an outgoing, animal, nature, and gin-loving vegetarian. Being in a crisis is something that she knows a fair bit about... becoming a mum, and giving up her steady career, being an Autie mum - with a child on the Autism spectrum life is never dull! What keeps her sane is positive psychology, fulfilling her passions, and generally seeing the funny side with friends.

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